The still small voice...

Induction has continued at a fast pace this week, with very little time to stop and draw breath. There have been lots more "introductions", and I have my first work to do in preparation for a New Testament seminar next Monday.

The essay title is: "Analyse the different ways in which Paul presents himself as a model in 1 Corinthians" - we don't have to do the essay this week, but we will for every subsequent week. With the lectures, placements and various community activities going on, balancing time is going to be very important!

In the midst of all this new information, however, we had a session with the principal that was much more of a "stop and take stock" time. And this is where I heard the still small voice of God.

As I've said, I've been hyped-up and excited about term finally starting, and wasn't feeling any fears or concerns that some of my peers have. But, after Martyn gave us a little reflection on the story of Jonah, he gave us space to go and be - whatever, wherever - and to come back if we wanted. During that space, I've felt God challenge me about a particular "letting go" that he may want me to do. I'm not certain yet, and I don't want to write any more about it this moment, but I have some serious reflection to do on this topic, so will no doubt be back with more news at a later date!

Formation & Theology

It's been an intense day today, with a lot of input, handouts, and sitting around listening to people! I realise it's necessary this early, as it's pretty much the only way to give us a lot of information that we need to understand how things work, but I am looking forward to when things become a little more interactive!

This morning was a lot about the process of ministerial formation - basically, taking the nine Criteria for Selection that form the basis of the discerning process before being recommended for training, expanding them into various areas of development that should happen during training, and how to assess progress and growth in each area (which takes place largely through personal reflection, alone and with relevant others). This is of vital importance, as, with all the academic work that needs to be done, it can be easy to become so focused on the latter that the former is neglected. But, of course, I am not in training to achieve a degree from Oxford University - I am in training to become and ordained priest in the Church of England. The process of ministerial formation is crucial in keeping the focus where it needs to be.

That said, the academic side of it is important as well, and we heard about the structure of the Theology degree this afternoon. There are 16 of us doing the BTh (others in my year are doing different academic courses), which is the largest number for some time, I believe. We have various lectures to go to (including some in Oxford), and a weekly seminar (in groups of 8), for which we all need to prepare an essay. So yes, that means I will be writing an essay a week!

Finally today, we met with some of the 2nd years doing the same course to hear their perspectives on it, having had a year's experience. It's going to be hard work, no doubt, but they gave us some survival tips! I have to say, though, that I'm a little worried - not because I'm daunted by the prospect, but because I'm not daunted. Some of the other ordinands were expressing various feelings, and the 2nd years were saying they were not to worry - they'd all been there, and it was good to be feeling what they were feeling.

The things is: I'm not feeling that at all - I'm just excited at the prospect of being here, studing theology, drawing closer to God (and being changed through that), and the whole being prepared for ordained ministry! Maybe this is due to my having already had nine years of licensed ministry within the CofE, maybe not. And I know we can't (or shouldn't) pretend to be feeling things that we're not. Maybe the excitement will wear off or be replaced by other feelings soon enough.

But what I do think is important is this: while I feel excited and energised and close to God, I need to be supporting those of my peers who are feeling under pressure, scared, daunted or whatever else. This is part of what it means to be at a residential college - we are all going through the same process, and need to develop that interdependence that Paul speaks of in 1 Corinthians 12 (the church as the Body of Christ). I feel strong now, so can support those who feel weak; and when I feel weak (which will surely happen at some point in the next two years), then I will be able to look to others for support from their strength.

Induction underway!

Today has seen the first full day of induction week, after term officially began last night with tea, followed by a Eucharist. The Eucharist was very moving; there was a real sense of the Holy Spirit's presence, bringing a sense of peace amongst us, as we felt the awesomeness of just what God has called us to!

We've had a chance to meet the staff, where I discovered yet another family connection - one of the staff members was at the same Oxford college as my sister, Sam, at the same time. There are a lot of these connections popping up in Cuddesdon!

We've also heard a bit about the history of the college, and been introduced to the way of the Common Room - including how the bar system operates! (Very important!) And then, this evening, we had an introduction to the liturgical settings used for Evening Prayer. Whoever leads Evening Prayer has to sing the opening line of each canticle solo - something I'm not looking forward to doing when it's my turn!

The weekend will be comparatively quiet - the College Principal (Martyn Percy) is hosting a drinks reception at his house for newcomers tomorrow, and then Sunday will see the first Eucharist of term at the Parish Church, All Saints. Then induction week continues with a vengeance on Monday...

Almost ready to start!

We're nearly there! Term finally gets underway this Thursday - and I am definitely ready for it! We're well settled in, and have met lots of great people here as we have become part of the college community. For example, just this afternoon, there have been a good 30-40 ordinands and families picking the apples off the trees in the college orchard. These will then be taken to be made into apple juice, which the college then sells. While it was going on, Clare & I took a moment to look around the field at all the activity, and we both had this real warm feeling inside that was simply, "yes, this is where we're meant to be". It felt good!

It all kicks into gear on Thursday, as we begin Induction. There are lots of things going to be happening over the first week - we've got a programme - and a lot of it begins, "Introduction to..."! So we'll have an introduction to the Common Room; to Evening Prayer, to College, Training & Formation; to Biblical Studies; etc, etc! No doubt it will all become clear as each day goes along!

We start with a welcome Eucharist at the Parish Church on Thursday afternoon, followed by supper and a chance to get to know people (many of the single ordinands don't arrive until Thursday, so it will be an especially big day for them, meeting so many new people). Friday morning begins with the first 7.30am Morning Prayer - what is a daily event, so no more lie-ins for me after that (except Saturdays!) And then we go into the first of the many "Introductions".

Now that things are kicking off, I will be much more regular with my blog entries. If there's ever anything which prompts a question in your mind, do use the "comments" section, or send me an e-mail if you have my address. Thanks for all the prayers up until now - please don't stop as college starts; I have a feeling they will be needed more than ever!

Morning Prayer

I knew before coming to Cuddesdon that the Daily Offices (both Morning and Evening Prayer) play an important part in the life of the college.

But it has been a pleasant surprise to find that a number of ordinands have kept Morning Prayer going through the holiday period. It is held at 9am (rather than the 7.30am it will be when term starts), and is in the parish church, rather than the college chapel.

I have been going every morning since finding out about it, and have also led it a couple of times. We use the Common Worship form of Morning Prayer, which, of course, is what is used by the staff team at St. Mark's Biggin Hill. So I am very familiar with it!

But it has been a real blessing to me, both in meeting with God during this "waiting time" (until term starts), and in feeling like I am becoming part of the college community. There's something about corporate prayer - especially with fellow ordinands - that is missing in my own personal quiet times. So praise God for this opportunity to pray regularly with others!

Settling in at Cuddesdon

It's just over a week since we moved in, and we finally have Internet access again! It took a little longer than expected to get back online, and it's made me realise how dependent we can become on it if we're not careful...

The move went as well as can be expected, although we had a lot of fun trying to get furniture up the very narrow stairs! A number of items had to be taken apart and reassembled...and the bed didn't make it at all! That is now being stored in the college loft (covered with a plastic sheet, as there are a number of resident bats there!) and we are using my brother's spare bed, which comes completely apart, so could make it up the stairs!

We're mostly sorted here now, and it definitely feels like home, even with it being so much smaller than our last home in Biggin Hill. Give it a few more days, and we should be in a fit condition to receive visitors!!

There aren't that many people around the college at the moment. Last year's 1st-year students are mostly on placement or holiday, but we have met a number of them, as well as a few other early arrivals in my year (including one person who was at my old church youth group at the same time I was - what a small world it is!) One nice thing about Cuddesdon is that there are 3 summer socials a week, which has helped us get to know people - there was a BBQ two days after we moved in, for example. We also have morning prayer at 9am during the week, which I've been going to - it's a good discipline to get into before term starts (although it will be a little earlier than 9am then!)

We hope to have a few days away at some point before term starts, but no definite plans yet. Another advantage of having online access back - so much easier to check out what possibilities there are for cheap short breaks!

Finally, thanks to everyone who has sent us a "New Home" card - they are all on display, and are a great reminder of the fact that so many people are thinking about and praying for us.

Update on the move!

Apologies for so little activity over the last couple of weeks. The move is now less than a week away, and we are up to our eyes in sorting, packing, trips to the recycling place, etc. On Monday of this week, we sent several pieces of furniture that won't fit into the new place to Give2Give, and then yesterday, some more went to my parents, who will be looking after it for the next couple of years. We hope that everything that is left will fit when we get to Cuddesdon!

Anyway, the move is happening on Tuesday of next week, so this will probably be the last post before then. Hopefully there will be a lot more time to blog after the move is all completed!